Harbin : Day 4

One of the greatest paradoxes in my life is my undying love for skiing and my reluctance to spend the great deal of money which it unfortunately entails. So yes, there was what was reported to be a fairly decent ski resort about 90 minutes outside of Harbin, but no we didn't decide to fork over the $80 US that it would've cost us to go skiing there for a day. What we did find however was a much smaller (much much much smaller) ski hill just on the outskirts of town that was so cheap it was almost free. Not only was it really cheap but the service was great too. They had people who would do your boots up for you! That's pretty awesome. Sadly the ski hill consisted of a single bunny run and a rope tow. On the other hand, it was Gatsby's first time ever skiing so the situation was pretty ideal for giving beginning ski lessons. It was pretty difficult trying to teach someone to ski in Chinese but eventually I figured out the right set of vocabulary and all in all it was a pretty enjoyable way to spend the morning.

After skiing we went and grabbed some noodles by the train station and then boarded our long and painful train ride home. This time we had two seats in the hard sleeper car and two seats in the regular car. The three guys took turns sleeping in the bed and sitting in the cheap seats. It is hard to imagine how painful it would be to have purchased a "standing only" ticket from Harbin to Nanjing.

Harbin : Day 3

If you go far enough north, and stay long enough, it stands to reason that eventually you will be eaten by a polar bear. This seems fairly certain. Thus, we put all the polar bears we can catch in cages and drive gas guzzling cars to fuel global warming so that we can destroy the habitats of the remaining few. Now, if this perfect plan fails to completely mitigate the issue at hand at least we can more easily control who gets eaten by the polar bears and when. And that brings me to day 3 in our adventures to the northern China frontier. We went to Polarland which was this great arctic themed zoo/aquarium thing the highlight of which was the two enormous polar bears that they had. In actuality we never got to see the polar bears eat anything they just swam back and forth, all that stuff about polar bears eating people was just to build suspense. But in some other universe perhaps they feed people to polar bears at the zoo. Maybe convicts or something, I don't know. Well, after the polar land we went to dinner at a Russian restaurant that Gatsby's friend recommended and which we all heartily approved of after we ate there.

walking to polarland

Harbin : Day 2 Part 2

In the afternoon on day two we went and saw the reason that Harbin is famous: the snow and ice festival! It was pretty impressive and lived up to the hype for the most part. It would have been much more enjoyable had I not contracted an incurable case of the hiccups (the kind that hurt) for the last 45 we were there. Because it hadn’t officially opened yet there were some parts that were closed off. I could try and describe all the different sculptures and buildings but that would just unnecessarily drain my literary powers which are not unlimited. So instead I’ll just share the magic of Harbin’s number one tourist attraction through some enlightening pictures.

Harbin : Day 2 Part 1

It was the day after Christmas (is that called boxing day? I can’t remember) and we had big big plans for how to spend our second day in China’s winter wonderland. We woke up early and followed the public transit directions we got from Google to find our way to the Siberian tiger park. 

This park was absolutely amazing. It was probably the highlight of the trip for me at least. When we got to the ticket window there was a sign listing entry prices of course, but this was accompanied by another sign that was a ‘menu’ of all the live animals you could buy to feed to the tigers. We bought a chicken for 60 RMB.  While we were waiting for the armored bus that would conduct us through tigerland my roommate Gatsby decided to buy me a Christmas present, and for some reason in his mind that meant furry animal hat. So that combined with the age old Roman tradition of wearing a finished piece of taxidermy on one's head (and all the pomp, majesty, and machismo that accompanies that) accounts for my wearing a tiger hat all day. Ok, now that I’ve rationalized myself, back to the story. We all hopped in an armored bus and then we were driven through the enormous park that was filled with tigers at every turn. They would come right up to and in front of the bus. Near the beginning a jeep drove in with our chicken sitting on the roof. One tiger leaped onto the roof of the car causing the chicken to fly down into the hungry waiting jaws of a second 600 pound striped killer.

After the bus tour there was a second section where you could stroll along an elevated covered walkway and look down at the tigers who, when we got there at least, were all napping in a big dog tiger pile. Here there was another opportunity to feed the tigers fresh meat, but this time you could throw it to them yourself. Since opportunities like this are non-existent in the civilized world I bought another live chicken and dangled it over the railing and over 40 hungry tiger mouths. If you’ve ever wondered where the phrase “Voracious as a Siberian tiger in Harbin who has just had the good fortune of expropriating a mouthwatering chicken and is engaged in tearing it to pieces” came from (and who hasn’t wondered that) it came from my head just now, and the spectacle it was coined to describe was pretty awe-inspiring to say the least.

I hand fed THAT meat to THAT tiger! Oh yeah.

One last thing that we saw at the tiger park was the only living white liger and one of only a few living ligers period. It was magical, but that should come as no surprise. After all, that’s what they’re bred for.

Doesn't it look majestic? Or is that smug?